Welcome, New Mudders!

We are a week away from the 2012 Mount Snow, Vermont Tough Mudder challenge.  Yes, challenge, because it's not a race.  Races have winners and places and PRs and pace clocks and egos.  Challenges have you and your ability to overcome them, or not, depending on who you are and what you are trying to accomplish.

This is my second year running / climbing / swimming / crawling / freezing / burning the VT Tough Mudder.  I have no pre-mudder jitters because I kind of know what's in store for us Mudders.  "Kind of" because they changed the course layout, added some new obstacles, and have three mystery obstacles.  We can only prepare for what we know and I have found that what we know ain't much.

My brother, Mid-Life Crisis, and my good friend, Only Dates Crazies Too, will, of course, be joining me again this year.  They would not miss another year of Mudder Madness.  We are fortunate this year to have several others join our unofficial team!  Brief introductions for our new Mudders are in order:

• Whitey McWhiskey:  You may remember Whitey from last year's MetroDash.  Well, he is back, after a brief hiatus, and will be plowing his way through this year's Mudder.  Short of stature but not short on charm, Whitey is always a great addition to our growing team.  Welcome back, Whitey!

• Just Out of Diapers: This youngling is new to our group, brought in by Mid-Life Crisis.  I can only assume that she is with him as some sort of community service.  Maybe she volunteered to help the elderly to get her Girl Scout merit badge.  I don't know.  Either way, she has gone above and beyond in aiding our geriatric team member fulfill his given race name.

• The Bunny Balladeer: Bunny is an old friend from high school who has recently taken up running in order to find new ways to sing.  Yes, to sing.  She is always singing.  Always.  We did chorus together so, yes, she sang there; but she sings everywhere... apparently even while running.  Thankfully she has a great set of lungs (wink wink nudge nudge) to carry those tunes :)

• Snake Your Drain: New to obstacle racing but not new to physical challenges, Snake Your Drain is primed for this year's Mudder event.  He is strong and determined, which has helped him overcome past hurdles.  I do not expect that this new endeavor will have him blow a gasket or pop an O-ring and, as long as he stays focused and calm, he will not hit a stop valve which would hinder his flow rate.  Ballcock.

• Bunny Chaser: B.C. is also new to obstacle course racing but has hit the season in full stride.  She has signed up, along with Bunny Balladeer, for some of the longest and toughest obstacle courses in the region!  Impressive for a noob.  She and Balladeer try to join the same events so one can sing in new arenas and the other can chase her the entire race, hence the name.  With her successful pre-season races under her belt, this might be the time when the Chaser because the Chased.

There you have it.  Our team is officially unofficial.  There may be more people jumping into our ragtag group and they will be welcome.  If they're lucky I will give them nicknames.

Good luck to my friends and anyone else getting ready for the 2012 Vermont Tough Mudder.  Revel in the mud.  Embrace the cold.  Rejoice in the camaraderie.  Swear at the Berlin Walls (you'll see).  Above all else, enjoy the Mudder, my friends.  Enjoy it Aggressively!

Aggressively yours,

Illustrious

2012 Hynes 5-Miler

Ah, good ole' Lowell, MA.  A city that was once hailed as the heroine capital of the country has slowly become a city that offers so much more.  No, I don't mean a wider array of pharmacological delights... I mean, sure you can get that, too, but that's not the point of this... no, I don't know where.. stop asking... seriously, I have no idea... and the password is "Cinnamon Munchkins."

eh...

Lowell has, through patience, good ideas, and good people, slowly transformed from a relative, pardon my course language, poopy-hole, to a vibrant city of art studios and cafes, of entertainment venues and business ventures, and, of course, of races.  Lowell has become a hot-spot for local racing, be it triathlons, duathlons, marathons, etc.  One of the many events that Lowell offers is the Hynes 5-Miler, put on by the Wild Rover series.

This has been my second year running in this event and, for those of you who follow Age Aggressively already know, the 5-miler is a good race for the novice runner.  Those of you who have been following me also know that I may or may not have allegedly poked fun at Lowell in last year's review of the race... because it's Lowell.

Well not this year.  Let me break it down for you

The Organizers / Volunteers:

Hard to find me in the crowd during the 1st mile

The Hynes 5-Miler was a great race!  First off, the organizers did a bang-up job.  There was minimal waiting at the registration desk and, if you registered early, you had your name printed on your bib.  I was not some unnamed number running with the masses.  I was someone!  This is good because you might not have noticed me running with the other racers had I not had my name on my bib.  Without it, you would have never seen me.

They provided two water stops, around miles 2 and 4, which was plenty for a 5 miler, and each was manned by enthusiastic and friendly volunteers who all had words of encouragement for all who partook of their offered beverages of what I can only assume was Lowell's finest Merrimack tap water, which was awarded "Most Almost Palatable Liquid Offered Outside Mexico."  (Sorry, I made that up... I promised no jokes about Lowell... won't happen again)

A little bit easier to find me in the 2nd mile

The Competitors:
The unseasonably warm weather brought with it a full array of racers both young and old to participate in the event: A-listers, Old Timers, First Timers, and, yes, the Costumers.  Due to it being an Irish-themed race and it so close to St. Patrick's Day, there were many bedecked in St. Paddy's Day colors of white and green (no, not me), some with green tutus (no, not me) , and one man dressed as a leprechaun (no, not me).  Not being Irish, I did not dress for the Gaelic occasion.  I decided to wear my official 2012 racing gear (yes, that's me).

My secret identity is revealed.

The Course:
The course is not too challenging.  It is fairly flat, with a few dips here and there.  It's a good course if you are trying to set a PR or if you are new to this distance.  The organizers provided timers possibly at each mile, possibly because I can't remember, so you could keep track of your amazingly fast, stellar progress.  All along the course there are people from Lowell and surrounding towns encouraging the runners as they stride to racing glory.   Well, most are doing that but some just pointed and laughed.  Not sure why.  The course also brings with it scenic views of Lowell with its Spaghetti Bridge, the Edson and St. Patrick's Cemeteries, and its well made roads paved with pure, undiluted, black tar heroi... (dammit, I said no more jokes about Lowell).

The Overall:
The Hynes Road race, which is the third and last race in the Wild Rover Series, is a fantastic way to spend a Sunday afternoon.  Did I mention that the finish line is at an Irish Pub and they keep their lot open for open air festivities?  Yeah, it is.  A pub... that serves beer.. because it's Irish-themed... and they drink things... like beer.  The finish line also offers plenty of post-race food and drinks for all the racers.  No one went hungry or thirsty after the event.  When all is said and done, this is a fun race.  Is it the best venue?  Depends on who you ask.  Is it the best course?  Depends on what you're looking for.  Is this an event that people should try because the overall experience is an afternoon well-spent?  Absolutely!  Am I mildly biased because my race day picture made it into the Lowell Sun?  You betcha!  However you want to take it, I will be looking forward to running this again in 2013.  Hopefully we will see more of you there.

... and the password has been changed to "Cinnamon munchkins with sprinkles."

 

Going for the... um, what medal do you get for  40th place?