Saturday, May 17, 2014

Rants and Raves: Ralph Waldo Emerson 10 Mile Trail Race - Concord, NH



Where it was: Ralph Waldo Emerson Trail Race in Concord, NH
http://www.acidoticracing.com/events/view_event.php?ID=6#.U2RQvuZdVQY

What it is:  Acidotic Racing puts on several trail races a season.  This was the first acidotic race Age Aggressively ran and, like meth*, it was addictive the moment we started.

*To all you kiddies out there, meth is bad.  This was only used as a comparison and by no means was it suppose to convey support or encouragement of meth use.  You can't do much on meth except die.  If you die you won't be able to experience the joys of life, like trail racing with other likeminded crazies.  Crack**, of course, is a different thing altogether.

**Yes, crack is also bad!
 
Feeling Super!
Who was racing:  Your dear Illustrious, McWhiskey (reverting back to his maiden name), and the newly named GPS (to be explained later), along with several other people, men and women alike, old and young, who enjoy the thrill of the trail, the pace of the pursuit, the freezing cold of the rain.

Why we do it:  We as a people have grown tired of running on the roads.  Let's face it, roads eat you up.  Like marriage, roads are unforgiving and pound away at your energy, your body, and your soul, leaving you an empty shell, a remnant of the strong person you use to be.  Okay, not really, only marriage does that.  Roads just hurt my delicate feet and are boring as f***.  Trails, however, offer up constant changes in scenery, of direction, of challenge.  Trails, simply put, are more fun, and who wouldn't call the chance of sprained ankles, broken bones, falling over roots to fall face first into boulders fun?



 


Rants:
  1. It was cold and rainy.  I know this isn't the race organizer's fault but this is the only rant I can come up with because the race was fun.  So, it was cold and rainy which, as I think about it, wasn't that bad because the weather was perfect once we started running.  Dammit... so this isn't a rant.
  2. Ok, how's this:  Due to the weather I was forced to sit in a cramped car with two annoying teammates instead of warming up for a trail run... nope, that doesn't work either because it became more team bonding.  Dammit... this isn't a rant either
    Pre-race warm up, Aggressive-style!
  3. I am rantless... which is a rant!
Raves:
Who knew runners were so happy?
  1. Let's get down to brass tacks for a moment.  I have no idea what that means: brass tacks.  I can only assume it should go with "uphill both ways in the snow," but I can't be sure.  Sounds old.  Anyway, brass tacks: the price of the race alone should make you want to run it.  For under $30 you get (a) an awesome trail run (b) a tech race shirt (c) free food supplied by local vendors (d) proceeds of the race went to support local charities and (e) dude, seriously, it was under $30 dollars.
  2. Trail racers are a different breed of runner.  Road racers have this long, sinewy form and grace about them - they're like the gazelles of the running world, effortlessly gliding above the pavement as they float to their 4 minute mile finish.  Trail racers are like gazelles whose legs were exposed to gamma radiation.  I've never seen quads this size on runners and that was just the women.  After watching them run, which was ever so briefly as they tore into the brush, I could only imagine there was far less gliding, much more grinding everything in their path to a fine powder from their quadrasaurs.  Maybe this should have been a rant due to the fact that I don't have quadrasaurs, or quads of any time, not even a gazelles.  Yes, I have quad envy.
  3.  Everything from the course direction to the pictures were due to club volunteers.  Other event organizers should take note of how acidotic racing does their races because for one price you got everything, even free pictures.  The pics were not your cheapo iphone pics either, they were high quality stuff - and free.  Did I mention that?  Free.
  4. "I have no idea where I'm going" - GPS
  5. Ok, storytime: Nice Pipes (seen to your right) signed up for the 10 miler with us.  She was all set to run the 10.  She started with the other 10 milers.  She followed the course with the other 10 milers... and completed the 5K, which was also being run the same day.  Somewhere along her run she took a left when she should have went right.  Not to be deterred from her original goal, Pipes set out once more to complete the 10 miler and once again, and no one knows how, she took a wrong turn and completed the last two miles of the 10 miler.  On the down side, she never ran the 10 miler.  On the upside, she came in first place for the unplanned 5 miler!  For your efforts, your commitment to the race, and to yourself, we hereby award you the new blog name: GPS!

 


Overall:
Do it.  Register for races organized by acidotic races.  Have fun.  Leave the road.  Hit the trails.  If you had a barrel full of monkeys you would put it down to run these courses - it's that much fun!  WARNING:  Please pay attention to the arrows and directional flags.  They are everywhere and it's practically impossible to get lost... where'd Amie go?

Losing teammates since mile 1
- Illustrious

Results:
http://www.acidoticracing.com/viewResults.php?CurID=6
19 Todd Spencer



01:24:29 00:08:27
44 Michael Hillis



01:45:50 00:10:35


 Shockingly, GPS is nowhere in the results.  They must have lost her info :)

2 comments:

  1. My only rant is that every time I read "acidotic" I think it says "idiotic", which makes this race report confusing! ;-)

    ReplyDelete
  2. LOL - what's confusing if why we don't race together sometimes; but then I remember, you live in South America.

    ReplyDelete